Dr Stupids rants

matt_hell @ 2009-12-16T08:09:00

2009-12-15T21:08:32Z

matt_hell @ 2009-12-05T07:53:00

2009-12-04T20:52:30Z

alrighty i am fucking broke thanks mainly to work fucking me around with my pay. each week it goes down, each week i dunno if im getting paid weekly or fortnightly and its fuck all the start with. today im going to print out my online bank statements and circle where my 'salary' deviates constantly in lieu of payslips and start asking the owners some questions.

im selling music gear to eat, im not listing it but if there is something of mine you have ever been interested in put your hand up. if you want to buy my pink gretsch you are outta luck unless you are the person who painted it. cheap acoustics if anyone wants one. black les pauls are not for sale. grab a fender telecaster, strat or precision bass, i never play them live.

in general if you send me an sms and i dont reply dont send me an angry message in the middle of the night abusing me for taking a 'stand against you' like someone did last night whilst i was asleep, i have no credit and have no money to buy any. i will however use the stored anger of forcibly quitting smoking, drinking, eating and working in retail to punch you in the face repeatedly and finish you off with a housebrick.

matt_hell @ 2009-10-23T08:16:00

2009-10-22T21:18:56Z

how often do you find yourself hunting around for stockings for a gig. when you have a penis?

see some of you tonight at the sando!

live music rant

2009-10-18T21:03:21Z

ok so the hoey and the harp have closed their doors and the annandale is in trouble. and all of you are whining about the great injustice it is to the upcoming bands of tomorrow and all that shit. i've played all those venues over the years and frequented them all seeing local, national and international bands. i missed wolfmothers's first show (at the vic on the park on a thursday night, not a hoey monday as the story goes) because i was rehearsing but watched the next 20 or 30 shows on weeknights around the hoey, candys, 77 etc. i saw little birdy's first sydney show up at the hoey on a wednesday night.

anyway the point is that im still regularly attending and playing shows and all the cunts who are whinging about venues closing are not at gigs. get off your fucking facebook group and go to some fucking gigs you fucking wankers.

if you are offended by this then go fuck yourself, get your finger out of your ass and put your money where your mouth is.

if the lewisham hotel doesn't close to live music next it will be a miracle. i have tried the place with my last three bands and two of those bands can fill sando, lansdowne etc but always play to nobody there. i dont live near there but plenty of people certainly do. personally i bring back the strippers and pokies so least they get some clientelle rather than the couple of pinging goths barely drinking at abduction.

exciting times!

2009-10-14T21:05:23Z

on tuesday baxter breathed life for the first time this year. oh dainty automobile how i missed you. took him for his first spin, almost entirely sideways and you still can't wipe the smile off my face. then took him to the auto electrician to get the new headlight dimmer switch installed, yes more sideways action.

my first special order fender guitar arrived in the shop and its already sold. yesterday i got my mark bass amp order as well as cool strings and straps. this morning im setting up a mark bass stack and testing it out with a fender p bass, my face bass in the shop. now im waiting on all my new pedals and picks and stuff. today im going to start ordering in some really fucking cool guitars and amps. im thinking gretsch, esp, peavey and hiwatt to round out the stock. any suggestions?

last night i took baxter out to pick up alex from the airport. the idle was too high and the throttle return spring pretty useless. combined with traffic at the airport baxter overheated and blew a hole in the top radiator hose. pulled into a disabled spot (apt) and proceeded to argue with a security guard who pointed to the disabled sign and said i was not allowed to leave the car due to government security laws. um its overheated, i need to fix it. had to get nrma so i could cut the radiator hose off shorter, fill the radiator with water, change the throttle return spring and reduce the idle, because i was not allowed to leave the car to get scissors and water.

as soon as i started the car everyone flinched, then i dumped it up the road, fishtailing wildly. i guess that's going to get me in trouble with the 56,000 cameras i bet there are around the airport...

matt_hell @ 2009-09-15T18:43:00

2009-09-15T08:54:43Z

this afternoon i got a phone call about the guitar sales manager job at the music store and i have a trial day on thursday. YAY ME!!! since i have absolutely no experience i totally understand the trial thing and i get paid for it so that's pretty sweet.

since its a management position i have to not wear jeans and band shirt but i already found some plain black pants that aren't part of a suit and now i just have to dig out my non-studded belt.

i think my the awesome curry i made earlier gave me some special job getting powers, dont let me down curry!!!

is it wrong to sell myself stuff in a guitar shop? im great at dealing with the voices in my head. often they say "kill everyone" and i barely listen. i need a new wireless, half rack eq and compressor/gate in a 2 unit case for starters. and some new quad boxes with vintage 30 speakers. new heads for the ludwig kit...

matt_hell @ 2009-09-07T21:38:00

2009-09-07T11:43:48Z

why is it when im totally broke i find the supercharger setup i want for baxter really really fucking cheap

http://www.moparmarket.com/classifieds_view.php?classifiedad=28773

i guess it's the same as when the volvo cost slightly more to fix than the totally worked 340 V8 i wish i had bought instead...

one day everything will line up and i'll have a mountain of chrome through my bonnet.

awesome tuesday action

2009-08-26T07:13:54Z

yesterday was a GREAT day. started with breakfast beers. moved onto burrito party with hotbakeorations and then rock action at the sando. then drinking at kellys till i dont remember how i got home...

firstly thanks to everyone who came to the gig and made it such a blast. coming out on a tuesday is a big ask so i hope you all had fun. i did. in a dress...

gig got moved from the upstairs band room at the sando to the front bar with a shitty vocal PA system but i think it was more fun anyway. even if i couldn't hear my solos so i played widdly diddly stuff i dont need to hear. eating one and a half burritos made my dress very fucking tight on my guts. my veil lasted about 10 seconds before it fell off. i broke a glove and something else. i think i flashed everyone too. and yes i drank way more than i planned to before the set.

we got offered a record deal and a slot on a local mini-festival so it wasn't a bad first show. now i wonder if my nail polish will last till saturday's show...

FREE GIG TONIGHT

2009-08-24T23:04:57Z

platinum brunette are playing a free show at the sando in newtown tonight for anyone who is keen. free entry, free bands, free pool, free bbq and $6 jugs of beer between 7 and 8pm. we're on at 9 or 9.30pm.

this morning i woke up to the wind smashing my kitchen cupboard doors. maybe i can blame all the mess on the wind? nah...

pondering a breakfast beer and blowing my money on a new tattoo today. probably should just get one of my guitars fixed as a spare for the show tonight. nah fuckit a new wireless system...

matt_hell @ 2009-08-20T18:57:00

2009-08-20T09:00:55Z

matt in a dress, how could you miss it???

stuff and anus...

2009-08-17T01:24:29Z

what have i done lately? get drunk. stay home job hunting a few days until i go mad from cabin fever and stewing over things people do. get drunk. job hunt. drink...

well last wednesday i went to meet a mate about his playing drums in a band of mine, he won big on the pokies whilst waiting for me, we got trashed instead. sooooo trashed that i was found in such a mess outside kellys that a homeless drunk was looking after me. didnt cost me a cent though!

friday i got paid FINALLY and went to yar_daft_willie's bday drinks where good times were had. in fact that continued to the courthouse and then back to my place until it was almost 24 hours of good times.

the rest of the weekend was quiet, movies, reading, tasty fucking curry from hotbakeorations and not smoking. alas i have run out of curry and ice cream to replace my cravings but it did make me think that smokers are like pregnant women with strange cravings. not asking for a seat on the bus or anything though haha

matt_hell @ 2009-07-22T13:59:00

2009-07-22T04:07:21Z

happy birthday to sweet_coco and to hannah wherever she is... haha

the most important thing in my life at the moment is that last night i had a burrito, its was good but it was filling!!!

sootica and i went clothes shopping with no success but we did have a few beers and get tasty mexican food which was fucking AWESOME. it's not that far a walk to and from mad mex on crown street from my place afterall.

tonight's rehearsal is cancelled so i feel an anchorman dvd party coming on

matt_hell @ 2009-07-19T12:49:00

2009-07-19T02:49:54Z

i just saw this and had to share DRUNKMATT™

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcIrsyc5pWA

ahhh job hunting you blow

2009-07-14T00:47:20Z

finally getting knockback emails from jobs i applied for a month ago, without even an interview. fuck im better than most at what i do and i dont even get an interview for people to realise im a weirdo?

still trying to work out what i wanna do. i was told to do fleet controller/manager but that sounds like boring fucking admin hanging with boring fucking tards. rather do design or low rent pre-press. im thinking i should get my RSA and RCG and try for some bar work. any money is better than getting on the dole, never have and rather keep it that way.

the joy of being sick and not being able to eat anything much other than toast is getting drunk from two longnecks.

rawk action

2009-07-02T15:10:14Z

i just sang stuff. in tune. whoah. never thought that would happen. im a bit excited...

ze weekend of length

2009-06-05T05:46:29Z

what is everyone doing?

im not sure about tonight. maybe get a bunch of people down the courthouse to drink beers, smoke cigarettes and talk shit. that sounds pretty good to me.

tomorrow night im at the forbes listening to the awesome punk rock tunes, whilst basically drinking heavily, smoking and talking shit with people into good music. or those who pretend they do haha.

sunday i've not even thought about. hey maybe this weekend i will get some shit done around the house and work on baxter.

nah i will probably smoke a lot of crack saturday, drink until monday morning and then sleep all day. i miss drugs...

matt_hell @ 2009-06-01T17:04:00

2009-06-01T07:12:27Z

so im running a punk club this saturday at the forbes from 10pm till 4am. cos there is nowhere that just plays PUNK. no fucking sex pistols or sum 41, this is all about playing the stuff nobody else plays from refused and converge type stuff to the descendents and damned.

alas its not free to get into and the drinks aren't free but there is happy hour from 10pm to 11pm and $10 is worth hearing good tunes, and placating the management.

im trying to arrange some CD giveaways too that aren't just from my collection. but i forgot haha.

matt_hell @ 2009-05-28T14:30:00

2009-05-28T04:35:21Z

Tomorrow night Im going on a date with Claire Werbeloff, im going to chk-chk boom in her face!

matt is a moron

2009-05-26T02:26:24Z

last night i had a quiet night at home, cooked a fucking awesome dinner and setup leftovers for lunch today and shit. why was it so quiet? cos my phone was on fucking silent. moron. did i remember to bring my lunch and drinks and shit to work today. FUCK NO! nothing in the shop will compare to the tupperwared awesomeness that is waiting at home for me.

the more serious question is what has become of my life when i am dealing with the disappointment of leaving tasty food at home. my hair is brown, i have no visible piercings or tattoos, i drive a late model white volvo stationwagon. i would suggest that i go out with a librarian but that was my last relationship haha.

please help me get my life back in the gutter.

friday fail

2009-05-22T00:57:43Z

this morning i jumped in cross cunt and high tailed it out to the place where i bought my new 1TB internal drive for very little money. and its super dooper fast and cachey and all that. on the way out i remembered that i should have brought baxter's carby for rebuilding since the place was around corner from the nerd shop. luckily i didnt make it, the car blew up. again. rather than checking plus, leads etc. i just emptied it hoping that someone will steal it. didnt leave it unlocked with the keys in it cos it locks itself after a few minutes.

just now i have searched for and cannot find my cigarettes, there is a half pack on my bed, a half pack and an unopened pack on my coffee table. the next person i see is a dead person.

this weekend i am staying home and breaking things. or making baxter work.

books are the best people

2009-05-19T06:47:32Z

so lately i have been staying home and reading. dealing with people is doing my head in. missed birthday drinks friday, played cronulla on saturday (no real people), finally made it out to birthday drinks sunday. and i had a great time. even if it was hard to get out of the house and leave my books and dvds. i guess i need to drink before i leave the house.

tonight im am recording again, we forgot to do guitars on two songs so i shall nail them quickly tonight. sesame street theme song and 'why dont you fuck off and die'. going to redo all my clean parts with my telecaster, just cos i can.

got the cross cunt back this morning, so much more responsive so much quicker. what i thought was gayness was blocked up vacuum hoses throwing the computer out of whack. so now it has new hoses, timing belt, oil and water pumps, pulleys and intercooler bits. great times.

if i have time tonight i will pull the carby off baxter and drop it off in the morning for a rebuild. gotta grab some plugs, oil and a few other bits and then he's back on the road. look at me with both cars going!!! soon... soon...

question

2009-05-14T04:16:21Z

where does one aquire a gimp?

4pm fags

2009-05-12T06:52:52Z

i thought i would just jot down a little note to remind you that my dick is not sucking itself.

weekend of massiveness

2009-05-11T03:49:21Z

except for going to see some bands i stayed in bed all weekend reading and playing guitar. my guitar playing improved, my knowledge of platinum brunette songs has expanded and books on iggy pop and guns n roses are more interesting than fuckwits at the pub.

the weekend of RAWK ACTION

2009-04-27T03:55:31Z

friday night i hauled ass down to wollongong uni to see nancy vandal and frenzal rhomb. never been to the uni, missed a turn, bought a map and got us there to buy the last two tickets and with enough time to have a drink and smoke and buy muchos merch before nancy vandal hit the stage. they were awesome. the 5 piece lineup was better then the 6 piece i reckon. the guitar wasnt loud enough alas. jay and lindsay played with them and i was happy. frenzal were kickass too. gordy was super drunk but still drummed better than you and everyone you have ever met. put together. got back to sydney in record time and went to bed, i was hungover as fuck all day so driving to the gong and back was the final straw.

saturday was the benleesacarnt show, final show or final for that lineup is still not decided but it was a good show to finish with. i prefer the leaner, meaner, thrashier 4 piece lineup although my leads needed more practice than they got. drank many drinks, nothing broke, no punchups, only a few dummy spits and i kept my pants on until hours after we played. drunkenly running our gear over the road to zen 5 mins before they shut was excellent. and i had the biggest guitar sound i have ever gotten, 2 amps through 2 cabinets all the way from now on!

sunday i went and saw suss and gt_general play in their new band and they were great. much better than when we played together in bullitt. dont even know what they are called. was great to see rarr for the first time in ages.

this morning i was asked again to jam with platinum brunette, the drag cock rock band. will give it a go. got people who wanna try out for a potential new lineup of benleesacarnt. got another acoustic set coming up on the 5th of may. filling in on drums on 16th may. so im going to spending a lot of time practicing, writing and rehearsing. between all the fucking birthdays, engagements and other shit you people are organising. good times!